As I write this blog post, I have no Internet service. It is an odd and somewhat discomforting feeling in this day and age to be without what I perceive is my connection to the world, my friends and family. Most of what I have needed to do over the last 24 hours, has in some way involved using the Internet and so I continue to bump up against – oh, I can’t do that now. And honestly nothing has imploded!
My day is much the same – I have my basic needs met, I can call friends and family and the work that felt so weighty in its pressure of getting accomplished, is in all honesty not that important in the grand design of things. Today’s reading in Sacred Space (the Irish Jesuits prayer book for 2017) was from Matthew 7:7-12. Jesus is teaching, “Ask, and it will be given to you; search and you will find; knock, and it will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.”
Can I ask God to fix my internet service?! This passage has been fraught with wonderings for me throughout my life. It would seem that God desires to give us what we ask and seek after. Oh, the sermons and writings that have tried to make sense of why did I not get what I asked for or sought. Why wasn’t that door opened? God is not my Internet provider. He is not in the business of providing all I need at my fingertips instantly. He is not an impersonal being that keeps my life running smoothly. He is my heavenly Father, and in our relationship we talk – we don’t email or text, we talk and we listen and we wait together.
In the very act of conversing (praying) I receive something from God – the gift of Himself. As I open my heart to God in prayer, God’s hands are open to give me good – the goodness of Himself. Julian of Norwich says this most eloquently: “God of your goodness, give me yourself, for you are enough for me.” What a good God – one who loves when we come asking, seeking and knocking and delights in freely sharing his life with us.
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